My views on politics, life, death, the army, and other things too miscellaneous to mention here. This is a personal blog. This blog is 100% factual.
Bill Duckwing
Poet, Author, Journalist
|
|
| |
|
|
| |
Your Super-Cute Daily Terror Alert Update Will Be Forevermore:
|
|
|
|
|
|
  
"There are some myths and untruths surrounding the role God plays in our daily lives. To say that religion and politics do not mix, is certainly a myth, unless you ask a liberal. Anything that affects a Christian (and voting is one of them) — enters into the religious realm. Trying to separate the two is like trying to separate oil from a glass of water, it's impossible to do. "
|
|
| |
Thursday, June 08, 2006
Spoofing
I add to my blogroll the adorable Scrutator, which might be the most horribly facile website content I've ever seen, but still...just the blantant right wing spoofing is pretty cute.
I won't claim to be one of the originators of right wing spoofing, but I was definitely doing it well before it became the epidemic it's become. Nowadays, things are so weird in the blog community that actual left wing commenters will spoof right wing talking points in order to troll popular left wing websites. The point for any of this is anyone's guess. The comments made to posts at Scrutator, for instance, leave behind a clusterfuck of confused and angry fake confrontation, mostly made to mock...well, your guess is as good as mine...most likely people like me who are actually interested in why sites like these spring up in the first place...
I bring this up, because I was going to do a spoof Apple Coda template for a day or so, because of the Zarqawi thingy. I was planning to rename the blog, "CLAPPING FOR MORE PICTURES OF CORPSES!!" and yes, present every possible link and picture of Zarqawi's corpse, and other corpse crazy pics from Rotten, or Ogrish. I decided against it, not from tact, but from laziness -it would've taken me a few hours to revamp the site for what woud obviously only last a day or so at the most. You're welcome.
I have done things like this before. I did do a very special communist Apple Coda, with my avatar behind makeshift mspainted bars, and I affected a obvious and stilted writing style for posts. Also for some reason a very brief David Hasselboff pictoral with pink and light purple backgrounds. Don't ask me why!
But as you'll probably not take note of, I haven't spoofed the Bush administration in a very long time. And the reason for this, of course, is that when I do revert back into the silly conservative spoof, I do it in an attempt to tackle issues that might actually be controversial. See the estate tax riff a couple posts below, although who the fuck knows why that was controversial.
I mean, anyone attempting to defend Bush without any reservations these days is immediately laughed off as a spoof. Still, the scru's are, in their own way, kinda neat...
-duckwing, at 7:03 PM
|
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
What the Hell is Populism, Anyway???
I know this seems like a facetious question, given the three question marks and the "what's love got to do with it?" like vibe to the title, but I'm kinda mystified by idea of populism, except as a political tool to work over those who believe that nations inherently have a permanent silent majority.
I mean, I like John Tester, the challanger to Conrad Burns for the Senate seat in Montana. But in what way exactly is he a "populist candidate?" -Do the views of organic farmers represent the majority of Americans?? Are we all former organic famers in the same sort of mystical Americana dream, like the cowboy or the western outlaw??
I mean, really. The previous historic populist benchmarks include Teddy Roosevelt, a nut-job conversationalist, and William Jennings Bryan, a Jesus freak who still commands the respect of legions of the intellectually challanged intelligent design enthusiasts.
I mean, can't we liberals just get on the side of honesty this time around and admit that practicality and common sense just don't register to the majority? Why do we have to pretend?
-duckwing, at 9:54 PM
|
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
Being Taxed 2 Death...
I'll be one of the first to admit that being taxed by this government is not the funniest things to laff about in this crude sin-cursed world. I mean, if it comes to a nuke-fest with Iran, I'd, at the very least, would like a little extra moolah to put a down payment on some sort of make-shift fallout shelter in somebody's attic where I could store a smorgasborg of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom Cloud soup. I could then spend most of my evenings painstakingly painting images of those soup cans, place them in a New York Soho gallery, and pay a house band with my excess earnings to reinvent rock n roll.
But the only problem with this vision, assuming that the Liberal Senate does indeed reject the current proposal to void the estate tax once and for all, is that -given the fact that I have completely reinvented art, and also rock n' roll, is that my children will indeed receive less of my assets once I do indeed pass on. And if that does indeed happen, I mean ...fuck that. I'm totally fucking selling that piece of shit house band I financed with my own money down the river, and I'm also taking those soup can paintings, which have totally fucking reinvented modern fucking art, to fucking Montana. Where my canvasses will provide plenty of insulation for the mail bombs I plan to use to voice my opposition to the opposition to the personal freedom the estate tax attempts to overcome.
We shall overcome, my brothers and sisters. I was thinking that maybe Republicans had got it all wrong...calling it the "death tax" is way too un-evocative. Instead, maybe we should call it the "shit tax." Because while death may create an unpleasant odour to the uninitiated, I'll be the first to admit that exposed human feces takes a skill to ignore far beyond the ranks of the uninitiated.
But remember, my brothers. If we do decide to call the estate tax the "shit tax" -I totally own the rights to that. TM, dudes, TM. And please don't forget to unload your assets to me in your wills...
-duckwing, at 9:22 PM
|
Monday, June 05, 2006
Tales of Grizzly Adventure
Now, I'm not the most dedicated hip hop adventurer, goodness knows, but I picked up the Gnarls Barkley on a whim the other day, and while I think it's a fantastic album that pretty much deserves all the accolates it's been getting, I was a bit unnerved to note that there is a track on the album in which the singer, Cee Low, does do an impersonation of Dracula ("The Boogie Monster"). I note this only because the only hip hop album I've bought and enjoyed in recent years was 2003's OutKast album, Speakerboxxx/The Love Below, which was also another excellent album that I probably allowed the hot laser eye in my CD play to burn a few freaking holes into it whilst dancing to with headphones alone in my apartment. And my point is that indeed The Love Below disc also has a song about Dracula ("Dracula's Wedding"). And I guess I figured that twice in one millennia is too much of a coincidence to ignore.
 And by no means do I want to generalize. But, after acknowledging that hip-hop bands like Gnarls Barkley basically get enjoy exposure in Europe in order to placate thirty-something white urban male professionals who believe that the hip-hop golden age ended with the death of Public Enemy, I still have to express concern over the vampire boogey shit in modern hip hop. Not that I really think that it's a trend, but in my very limited knowledge of contempoary hip-hop, I'm still a little bothered by the notion that maybe the RIAA missed the boat and anchored their salaries against the nutty idea that modern yuppies equate Ann Rice and boogiemen with "edgy."
And I'm not claiming to be the ultimate arbitor of cool musical discretion or anything like that, either. I completely and profoundly rescind those medals, goodness knows. And goodness knows, I've been a fine and upstanding model of the upright citizens brigade lately, goodness knows, and I haven't taken the Lord's Name in Vain lately, and I wipe my brow with my hand from sweat, knowing that it will never cool me, and that when my Lord calls me my brow with be crowned by both bloody thorns, but also by a rising feverish temperature...
I was acosted by a grizzly bear the other day. It stood on it's hind legs and waved a paw in my line of sight, but all the same never looking at me directly in middle of the thicket. I know not where it went. And I am always concerned as to what event will influence the fluctuation of my internal body temperature. But I shall not want. Father, no...not you, grizzly bear....I commend my spirit. But I mean, c'mon, look at the mess you're making...think of the trashmen who will occupy this space in the morning...you need to think of the others before yourself...father....
-duckwing, at 9:39 PM
|
|
|
| |
|
|
|
